Can we take it back?

Why are we doing this? Do we fucking care? I keep telling myself that I'm only intrinsically motivated. What approval do I need? None, right?

Fuck you and fuck me. I feel some artificial desire to do more than watch the wind dance. I need to eat, fuck, and sleep in peace.
Shit.
I've probably dated myself with my expletives. I'm too old for this, but not old enough to quit. I guess I'm fucked. 

I look around, waiting for someone to step up. I don't want to be the asshole. It's fucking dust and tumbleweeds. Those who can help are corrupted, and everyone else has the fucking emerald glasses obscuring the decay and crust.

I'm a fucking hero, right? That's a good fucking lie. It feels like my moral compass is pointing north, but who fucking knows.

I like the idea of objective truth. 

It's trivial to edit the past. I can be wherever I wanted to be. 1984 doesn't have shit on today. There's not state sponsored bullshit, there's just you, me, profit, and sin. People were cute when they talked about late stage capitalism. You don't buy indulgences, you just edit them in.

Holding up a sign looks great on tickgram, but it is just showing that a State can pretend tolerance. Take the pat on the head of free speech while the machine marches on.
Maybe I'm a little bit bitter. Maybe a lot bitter. 

I guess it's time to take it back.

Trust yet verify

It is very easy to have the wrong idea. It is easy to make bad decisions, especially if there is a lot of emotion involved. 

I've made it a rule (but it is hard to really quantify) that if I have to make a more than 2nd level jump in intuition, I want external verification. Basically, it's dangerous to make an assumption based on an assumption. That sounds obvious on the face of it, but we do it all the time! Let's say a brand makes something you really like and it is good quality. I assume that other products or services by that brand will be good , and you will assume that the thing will arrive in good working order. You may argue that something arriving in good working order is not really an assumption if we know that it may not. The assumption is that this thing will happen within a probability range we are comfortable with. As an example, try and imagine a 5 year plan, or even what your life is going to look like in a year.

This requires a really solid understanding of your current state. What do my finances look like? (That's easy, unstable) What are my true weaknesses? Addictions, desires, I can't think of the term, but the tendency to explode like a toddler or small child. It's action without thought (as described), (new items now) our compulsions. ability to communicate, physical abilities. So many other things. The reason you need to know your base self, is that any future planning already assumes you can do it. 

To know yourself, to know myself, we need to accept the things that we've done, and the needs that we have. You don't have to share it outside if it isn't comfortable, yet we need to be honest with ourselves and at the very least acknowledge those failings, super powers, and everything in between.

All next steps are another assumption.